Home?

Where is my home? Where is my Refuge?

Confession from Conviction

I am convicted on how much I have been motivated heavily in life by pride and idolatry, and this summer during my internship, God really called me out on both. My idols are found in sports (Lebron James and the Cavs), friendships, romantic relationships, and a fixation that God has called me to be a senior pastor one day (which at this point, I am not entirely certain about). I wonder if studying here at Moody is actually of the Lord, and if not, then I labor in vain (PSA 122:1). At times, I am more of a Pharisee, giving God external praise, but deep down is a heart that is still yet fully surrendered to God. As far as sensing God’s commands as burdensome, I think about how I have little desire to evangelize or to truly love others selflessly; I should be doing both out of a sheer love of God. Lastly, I am guilty of elevating the opinions of others to be God’s voice when I cannot clear discern what He is saying.

Shorter version of promo

Classes start in a week so that means new season starts soon. Check a condensed version of my promo

Farewell to Arms

Due to certain people misinterpreting the purpose of this video and the intensity of people's perception of the message of this video, I took it off of Facebook, and now it will be exclusively on my blog.

This video is dedicated to the best friends at Moody that I lost last semester. May God make straight their paths and shine His face upon them!!!

Corinne Bailey Rae helps me say goodbye, enjoy:

Such Great Heights

It's been 5 years since God called me to a deeper understanding of Who He is. And to reflect on 5 years of intentional Christian living and my calling, we look to the future. We look to the next chapter of this Falcon Narrative.

Over the last 5 years, I have grown to Such Great Heights in stature and favor with God and man, but in the next season of my life I must be willing live without fear of falling from Such Great Heights.

I have been guarded and have put up layers to hide my true self, but next season I must be willing to be transparent and risk Such Great Heights in the eyes of others, so that God can be further glorified in my life. It's not a requirement, it's my life.

Can the Falcon risk his very image in order to be willing to fall from Such Great Heights??????!!!!???!?!?!????!!!;

Intern Chronicles #002

The internship at UBC is going pretty well, unfortunately, it is not all fun and games. I applied to get my internship endorsed through the Baptist denominational organization, but I was declined the endorsement because the issue of baptism. I got a call from someone from the organization during my job, and he explained to me that they could not endorse me because I have not received a believer baptism.

Now some may automatically deem it to be unjust or denominationalism, but it must be understood that in order to gain endorsement, I must be part of a Baptist church, and in order to be a member, one must receive believer baptism. So yes it is a denominational rule coming into play, but I can respect their notion behind so.

To give the backdrop of this issue, I grew up in a United Methodist church, in which I was baptized as an infant, and the only one of my parents' 3 kids to have been baptized as a baby (I feel there is significance in that seen in my life). The Baptist denomination and others do not uphold infant baptism to be "legit" or biblical; others would beg to differ. Recently, my friend showed me a book that supports infant baptism from a Covenantal Presbyterian perspective. There support came down to 2 elements of support: the accounts of whole families being baptized in the book of Acts (whole households implying children or infants) and Israelite circumcision being paralleled to infant baptism. Can't say I agree 100% or that they are heretics, but it's worth considering.


Now it starts the Bible battle of baptism. Alliterations aside, how can we process this debate? I spent the first 20 years of my life oblivious to this battle, so please excuse not know. Unfortunately, that excuse does not change the reality of facing this hurdle. My first inclination of it when I was 20 was: "Should the emphasis be on the water baptism or the baptism of the Holy Spirit?" I believe that question is valid, but not many would consider it in this discussion.
Is it necessary for someone having been baptized as a child, lived a life of Christian identity, gone through confirmation class (UMC supplementation of believer's coming to faith, despite being baptized as an infant), and have been living an intentional Christian life and ministry prep for 5 years to be baptized?

That is my struggle. I've asked friends, I've asked others, but what I have come down to is that I since I did not exactly want the endorsement because of the money involved, I would not go through a 2nd baptism, but if I am to join UBC, I would have to get baptized again. This baptism would not represent me becoming a Christian or anything like that, but it would represent coming before a congregation to make a public confession of faith and joining their community. This will be a decision that will possibly influence the future of my life and ministry.

I blame myself. When I decided to seemingly leave the UMC by not going to a Methodist seminary, I should've known that if go to any other denomination or any kind of church, I will have to submit to their authority. That means if I go Baptist, I must get baptized, and if I go Mehtodist, I must leave Moody.

Not much of a Catch 22 ...

Intern Chronicles Entry #001

First day on the job, and I did nothing. Was it a waste of time? I think not. I would like to hope that God is bigger than what we normally expect. I didn't do work, but I got to fellowship with my new fellow bondservants at Uptown. They have such a zeal about them and you can tell God is in their hearts.

I am currently reading a book called "Divine Appointments", which is for a membership class. The pastor is teaching a class on knowing, discerning, and taking advantage of divine appointments to minister. An area of my life, in which I struggle. Two things I've learned thus far: it starts with God and we need to be intentional about it.

I am currently struggling on the issue of baptism be cause I cannot join the church until I receive "believer's baptism". Though I new some denominations did not accept infant baptism, I was naive to think that it would not be an issue, but I was wrong. Sometimes you have to face the consequences of your ill-advised decisions, and live with them. Will I be baptized? I might. In order to have this internship, I have to be a member, in order to be a member, I must be baptized.